Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

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Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What do you say to a person at a funeral held at 10 A.M.?

Good mourning.

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. They hold it in place and wait for the world to revolve around them.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What can a yakuza do for living when he doesn't want to hurt people?

Tattoo master

Why do people at work always laugh at my jokes?

Because they're paid to.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What's the difference between someone falling from 21st floor and 1st floor?

21st floor person goes: AHHHHHHHHHH 1st floor goes: AHHHHHHHHHH

Why did the motorcycle fall asleep?

It was two-tired.

Marvel Jokes More Marvel Jokes

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel?

I am Root.

Wish Jokes More Wish Jokes

What did the pillar say when he forgot to wish his friend happy birthday?

I'll column later.

How can Euchre and Marriage be similar?

Sometimes you start out all hearts and diamonds, but end up wishing you had a club and a spade.

Bikini Jokes More Bikini Jokes

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

Why is it socially acceptable to wear a bikini at the beach but not on the bus?

At the end of the day I'm just a guy in a bikini on the bus.