Marvel Jokes

Why did Aquaman join the DC universe instead of Marvel?

Because he was hydra-phobic.

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Who makes the music for the Marvel movies?

The Avengers Ensemble.

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...

What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel?

I am Root.

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Music Jokes More Music Jokes

What kind of music did Jesus hate?

Anything by Judas Priest and Nine Inch Nails.

What kind of music do you like?

The other says, "I'm a big metal fan"

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What does HONDA stand for?

Hold On, Not Done Accelerating.

Why are clouds like jockeys?

Because they hold the reins!

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do people from the 1930's and /r/news jokes have in common?

They're both old.

What does Apu say when people leave him to browse reddit?

Thank you, Karma gain

Android Jokes More Android Jokes

Why does ACDC prefer Android to Apple?

She's Got The Jack

What do you get when you teach Android grammar?

A droid

Control Jokes More Control Jokes

Why are all these Juice fad diets so popular?

Because Juice control the media

Why was the teacher cross-eyed?

Because she couldn't control her pupils

Kernel Jokes More Kernel Jokes

Why did the chicken jump into the bag of popcorn?

The kernel was looking for him.

What's the difference between a puppy and a kernel of corn?

Nothing. They both explode when nuked in the microwave.

Root Jokes More Root Jokes

What do Badgers and Gynecologists have in common?

They both like to root around in your cellar

Why did I spill root beer on a DNS server?

Just because ICANN.

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

What is your dream car and why?

Minivan, because the sliding door joining in MAKES IT EASIER FOR DRIVE-BY BAZOOKA ATTACKS

How do witches lose weight?

They join weight witches.