Marvel Jokes

Why did Aquaman join the DC universe instead of Marvel?

Because he was hydra-phobic.

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Who makes the music for the Marvel movies?

The Avengers Ensemble.

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...

What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel?

I am Root.

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Control Jokes More Control Jokes

Why did the T.V. break up with the remote?

She thought he was too controlling.

How much for this remote controlled alien?

Sir, that's Stephen Hawking.

Dc Jokes More Dc Jokes

What do the Washington Metro system and the Little Mermaid have in common?

They're both under DC.

Why did Aquaman join the DC universe instead of Marvel?

Because he was hydra-phobic.

Aquaman Jokes More Aquaman Jokes

Why so down?

Aquaman: People think I'm not a real superhero. I'm tired of being walked all over. *Jesus enters Aquaman: Dammit!

How do you make Aquaman cool?

Put him in water!

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

Why did the bird join he air force?

He wanted to be a parrot trooper!

Why are ISIS fighters afraid to join the TEA Party?

They're afraid they'll be audited by the IRS.

Thor Jokes More Thor Jokes

Why can't Thor play the piano or hide n seek with his brother?

He can never find the Loki.

Why didn't Thor like the party?

It was too Loki.

Kernel Jokes More Kernel Jokes

What's the difference between a puppy and a kernel of corn?

Nothing. They both explode when nuked in the microwave.

Why did the chicken jump into the bag of popcorn?

The kernel was looking for him.

Root Jokes More Root Jokes

What is the difference between a dentist and a New York baseball fan?

One yanks for the roots, the other roots for the Yanks.

What do Badgers and Gynecologists have in common?

They both like to root around in your cellar

People Jokes More People Jokes

Who are the hamburgers favourite people?

Vegetarians!

Why do people buy expensive rims?

They're investing in wheel estate.