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Why do you ask for my daughters hand in marriage?

Do NOT say:"Because I am tired of using my own"

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do ghosts use to predict the future?

Horror-scopes!

What kind of bathroom does Napoleon use?

A Waterloo

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the inn keeper say to the Big Dipper when he asked if he could rent a room?

Sorry this is only a four star hotel.

Why not ask the guy who took that picture?

Just kidding, I ran over it.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What has two thumbs and got laid last night?

My hands.

Why can't you play peek-a-boo with Jesus?

Because he has holes in his hands

Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

What does a rock do all day?

Nothing. (this joke was made by daughter when she was 5)

Why did the man name his daughter Candy?

She was the sweetest mistake he ever made.

Marriage Jokes More Marriage Jokes

When I was a little boy I asked my mum 'how many is a couple?

She replied 'oh, two or three' Now I know why her marriage didn't last long

Why did the Arabic man ask for her hand in marriage?

Because she stole his heart