Why do you ask for my daughters hand in marriage?

Do NOT say:"Because I am tired of using my own"

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What machine should I use at the gym to impress girls?

The ATM

Why do towels get dirty?

If we use towels just to dry ourselves after washing off dirt and what not. Why do they get dirty??

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How flexible are you?

He asked. I can't do Tuesdays. -Tommy Cooper

How do you tell the difference between a factory worker, and a chemist?

Ask them to pronounce 'unionized'

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What's the easiest way to pay a musician?

Open the door, hand him the cash and take the pizza

What do you call someone from Zimbabwe holding a bottle cap in their hand?

A trillionaire.

Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

What if a third team came and attacked these two teams?

My daughter, not understanding football/making football more awesome

Who's there! Anderson! Anderson who?

Anderson and daughter came too!

Marriage Jokes More Marriage Jokes

Why is marriage like thin toilet paper?

Because you end up with a ring on your finger.

How is a marriage like a hot bath?

Once you get used to it it's not so hot.