Why did Helen Keller play the piano with one hand?

Because she used the other to sing

This joke may have profanity.

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How much is a $1,000,000 Bill worth?

Nothing! You can't use it anywhere!

What does Lebron use to high jump?

The Flosberry Flop.

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Whats the worst joke you can play on an American?

Two pies to the face and one somewhere in a field in Pennsylvania.

Why couldn't the leopard play Q: Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?

Because he was always spotted.

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What do you call it when the new US president waves his hand?

A microwave.

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A. The remote control slips from his hand.

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What did the Eskimo children sing when their principal was leaving?

Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

What song do you sing if you're not a fan of Christmas?

Sigh-lent night

Helen Keller Jokes More Helen Keller Jokes

Why couldn't Helen Keller vote?

She was a woman! And it wasn't until 1920 when the 19th Amendment was ratified. At this point she was 40 years old and could vote.

What did Helen Keller say after being handed a cheese grater?

That's the worst book I ever read.

Piano Jokes More Piano Jokes

What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

What do you get when you push a piano out of the second floor window of an elementary school?

A flat minor.