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Why don't women sleep on the left side of the bed?

Because they always want to be right.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What kind of fish would you want to go to bed with?

A cuddlefish! (corny I know)

What did the agnostic, dyslexic insomniac do?

Lay awake in bed wondering if there really is a dog.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why does Waldo wear stripes?

Because he doesn't want to be spotted

What's the last thing you want to hear when blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the suicidal college student say to his room mate?

Dont leave me hangin' bro

Why was the blonde in the tree?

A. Because she was raking up the leaves!

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How can you go without sleep for seven days and not be tired?

Sleep at night

Why did the European businessman sleep on the streets?

To avoid a hostel takeover.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How does the modern-day James Bond prefer his women?

Shaven, not furred

What is the similarity between women and square roots?

If they are under 16 you should just do them in your head.