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Why was the London sperm bank so unsuccessful?

The were only two donors. One came on the bus, the other missed the tube.

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Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

Why couldn't I run the Compressed File?

I was missing the important Bits.

What did the kangaroo say when her baby was missing?

Help! My pocket's been picked!

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What do a coffin and a condom have in common?

They're both filled with stiffs one's coming one's going.

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you when you're in there?

European

Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

Why did I stop reading M.C Escher books on the bus?

Because I always get weird stairs

What do you call a teacher that's always late?

Mr. Bus (think about it)

London Jokes More London Jokes

Why is the letter E like London?

Because it is the capital of England.

Why did the man fall in love with the banana whilst on a London attraction?

Because it was a-peeling on the Eye.

Tube Jokes More Tube Jokes

What's long and hard and full of seamen?

The tube sock under my bed.

What does an unborn fetus and a tube of toothpaste have in common?

Neither of them can be used as functional tables.