Why would an alien ever visit Roswell?

Fill in the blank or answer the question.

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What's red and black and screaming all over?

Stevie Wonder when he answers the iron.

How do like really laid-back types answer the phone?

Mellow.

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How do you know when a white girl recently visited her friends grave?

There's Starbucks next to the headstone.

Which wiki do dyslexic pastry chefs claim to be trying to visit before getting arrested?

Www.filopedia.org

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What do you get if you cross a student and an alien?

Something from another universe -ity!

Why haven't we found aliens yet?

Because they are searching for intelligent life too.

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What kind of engine did you put in it?

Cut to me filling my car with tomato soup* Me: Um... A fast one.

What is dry on the outside filled with water and blows up buildings?

A fish tank!

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What are some of your strengths?

Me: Shifting the blame HR: That's a horrible reply Me: No, your question was! HR: Wow, you're good!

How did I get here?

I'm sure my neighbors ask the same question every time they catch me in their house...taking a shower.

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Why would an alien ever visit Roswell?

Fill in the blank or answer the question.