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Booze Jokes

How do Ghosts get Drunk?

Booze.

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all your booze?

You invite two of them.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...

How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

What did the two story house say to its friend after it had just finished working out, and it's friend invited I to a party?

I'm two tiered. I came up with this at 1am, enjoy.

What did The Terminator say when he was invited to a music themed fancy dress party?

I'll be Bach.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why did the cookie cry?

It was feeling crumby.

Why did the shark go to the doctors?

Because he didn't feel very whale

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What's the difference between a Pilot and a jet engine?

A jet engine stops whining after it lands

What's the difference between Phil Collins and Germany?

We stopped Germany.

Mormon Jokes More Mormon Jokes

What do monks, rabbis, and Mormon priests have in common with brains?

The all tend to be found enclosed within temples.

Why did the Mormon cross the road?

To get to the other bride!

Catholic Jokes More Catholic Jokes

How many catholics does it take to change a lightbulb?

CHANGE!

Why would a Catholic priest start practicing at a prison?

He ran out of little boys

Spirit Jokes More Spirit Jokes

How does a booze thief make you feel better?

He lifts your spirits.

What's your spirit animal?

An eagle. They're so majestic." MEANWHILE Horse: hey eagle, what's your spirit human Eagle: this guy Dave

Baptist Jokes More Baptist Jokes

What do John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

They have the same middle name!

What's the difference between a Baptist and a Methodist?

A Methodist will say hi when he sees you at the liquor store.