Duct Jokes

What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

How much for that babysitter?

Ma'am, that's a roll of duct tape I'll take it!

What do you call Quicksilver when he's duct taping people's mouths?

A running gag.

What causes dry eyes?

Ducts out of water...

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Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What water does Snake drink?

Big Voss.

What can walk over the water, but can travel under the water without getting wet?

Jesus in a submarine.

Run Gag Jokes More Run Gag Jokes

What do you call a running gag on crutches?

A lame joke.

What do you call Quicksilver when he's duct taping people's mouths?

A running gag.

Conduit Jokes More Conduit Jokes

What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!

What do you say to give an electrician encouragement?

You conduit!

Dry Eye Jokes More Dry Eye Jokes

What do you use when you have dry eyes?

Moist-your-eyes-er

What causes dry eyes?

Ducts out of water...

Differ Jokes More Differ Jokes

How does a Confederate flag and a rainbow flag differ?

The latter represents people that win.

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

Mmm Jokes More Mmm Jokes

Why ya going to the airport?

Flying Somewhere?": "How'd you guess?": "Well, I saw your luggage, then when I saw the airplane ticket I put two and two together. So where you headed?": "Aspen.": "Mmm, California.. Beautiful."

What is the best part about duct tape?

It can turn "no, no, no!" Into "mmm, mmm, mmm"

Mmmmm Jokes More Mmmmm Jokes

What's the Best thing about Duct Tape?

It turns Noooo! Noooo! Noooo!......to..... Mmmmm, Mmmmm, Mmmmm.

What did the glue taste tester say?

Mmmmm.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What do you call a nosy hot pepper?

Jalapeno business! ha ha.. haha.. ha love this joke (Usually accompanied with three snaps of the fingers in the shape of the letter Z and moving my head from side to side)

What the hell am I doing here?

I don't belong here. GUY: I love that song. ME: What song