Quack Jokes

What is sticky and quacks?

Duck tape!

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why do ducks make the best detectives?

They always quack the case

When do you use duct tape on a duck?

When he's quacked.

What has four legs and quacks?

A paradox

What happens when ducks fly upside down??

They quack up

Why did the man throw duck food at Nurse Jackie?

Because she was a quack.

What do ducks get hooked on?

Quack

Why can't ducks tell jokes when they fly?

Cause they would quack up.

Why are ducks funny?

Cause they be quacking jokes

What's so lame about a duck President?

Pieces of bread, quacking, getting into all types of duck antics in the Oval Office! I'm game!

Why did the Easter Bunny have to fire the duck?

Because he kept quacking all the eggs!

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What is a detective duck supposed to do?

Quack the case!

Why were the ducks arrested?

They were selling quack in the park.

What are you on?

I said to him. "Quack" said the duck.

What do you call a duck addicted to crack?

A quack head. What is a ducks favorite snack Quackers. Why couldn't the duck drive his car His windshield was quacked.

What're you here for?

Asks the desk lady. "I'm addicted to quack."

Why do ducks make great detectives?

They always quack the case.

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Pet Store Jokes More Pet Store Jokes

Why did the junkie walk into the pet store?

To buy some quack croakaine!

What is the worst place to have the "you break it, you buy it" rule?

The pet store

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What do you call 2 doctors walking together?

Pair-o-Medics

What did the doctor say When a fruit walked into his office that was feeling like a vegetable?

What's tomato with you!

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Which doctor?

I replied "No, a medical one."

What did the doctor say to the injured gingerbread man?

Why don't you try icing it

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What products do you use for grooming?

She asked me. Her face looked quite taken aback when I said, "Facebook"

What did they used to be made from before the 1960s?

Potatoes

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What did Saint Patrick say as he drove the snakes out of Ireland?

Are ye alright in the back there lads?

How do you keep your hair from blowing everywhere when you drive in a convertible?

Cross your legs

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Which joke is better?

How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Ten tickles. How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Ten tickles.

How would you describe a joke about bones?

Humerus.97

Henry Jokes More Henry Jokes

What did Alyssa the duck say to Henry the beaver?

Quack quack!

Why do people think Henry the Sixth was a Norseman?

Because he was a VI KING.

Paradox Jokes More Paradox Jokes

What do you call two physicians?

A paradox

What's better than a paradox?

A pair of nurses