Import Jokes

What is Russia's favorite imported product?

Ukraine.

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Why doesn't Russia import water buffalo?

Because they already have Moscow.

Why you never mess with imported ants?

Because they are **important**.

Why don't you remove those barriers to imports?

It will ease my inflation and the benefits will trickle down.

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Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What do you call it if you were to second guess your decision to book time at a Native American community?

That's a reservation reservation reservation. (Credit to Brian Regan)

What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?

An elephant with hiccups!

Important Jokes More Important Jokes

What's the most important part of a vegetable's golf stats?

The handicap.

What's the most important part about making a Pokemon joke?

The Exeggution!

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How do they tie things down on the space station?

They use astro knots.

What do you call a person that raises the dead and also had a thing for napes?

A neck-romancer

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster?

Terrier-fied!

What do windows feel when they get hurt?

Pane!

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why are sinks depressed?

People look down on them.

What do you call a rooster looking at a vegetable patch?

Chicken Caesar Salad

Suit Jokes More Suit Jokes

What's an empty suit of armor doing on the drivers side of a car?

He went out for the knight. OK I'll leave now

What is Iron Man when he removes his suit?

Stark naked.

Vasectomy Jokes More Vasectomy Jokes

How does a guy prove he's tough?

He jogs home after his vasectomy.. Fairly old, vasectomies may not be so bad any longer.

What is the distinction between a man that has had a vasectomy and one who hasn't?

I don't know, as far as I'm concerned there's not a vas deferens.

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

What do you call it when a vegetable suffers heart failure?

A hearti*choke*....

What type of dog suffers from being inbred?

A hotdog