Spanish Jokes

What do you call an old Spanish car?

FeO

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What's the number ten's favorite Spanish phrase?

Diez mio!

What is the most Spanish body part?

Elbow.

What kind of dog should you get a Spanish speaker?

A spaniel.

What do you call a group of Spanish-speaking moms who band together to protect their neighborhood?

Super Barrio Mothers

What do you call it when a Spanish man goes to court for custody of his children?

Fight for your right to padre

How do you spell "Pringles" in Spanish?

Pringls

What did the Spanish fireman name his 2 sons?

Jose and Hose B

How many times should you check whether a sentence is written in English or Spanish?

Once.

How do you say dinner in Spanish?

JOHN CENA

What does a Spanish dog say at the marina?

Bark-o.

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What is the biggest plot twist in Spanish soap operas?

When Rodrigo finds out he is his own mother

What language do British wrenches speech?

Spanish!

How do you pick up older Spanish women?

Hola Seniority

How do you convert Spanish programming into English?

Yes++

What do you call a Spanish baker?

A con-quiche-ador

Why was the Spanish train the primary suspect?

It had locomotive. (I'm not sorry)

Why does the Spanish dude keep walking left?

Because izquierda going right.

What did the thirsty Spanish pirate say?

I need some arrrrrrrrrrrgua!

How do you say Tony Romo in Spanish?

Mark Sanchez.

How do you say doormat in Spanish?

Matador

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What sport is played in Spanish churches?

La Cross

Why did the English majors switch to Spanish?

Too many persuasive esses.

What did the Spanish musician say when he went fishing?

Castanets!

What does a Spanish cow say?

Muuuuuuuey!

How many Spanish people does it take to change a light bulb?

Just Juan.

What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?

Jose and Hoseb

What do you call s'mores in Spanish?

S'mas

What does a Spanish speaking ghost say when they like you?

Mi Ghosta!!

What do you call a bird that speaks Spanish?

A Si-gull

What's the similarity between a Spanish prison and Leonardo DiCaprio?

Now, both have an oscar.

What did the Spanish soccer announcer invest in?

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD**

What different about an American Christmas from a Spanish one?

Noel.

What does a Spanish programmer program in?

Si++

What do Spanish Canadians put on their tacos?

Pork, eh

Why did the Spanish train aficionado blow up his trains?

He had loco motives.

Why do Spanish beaches have a lot of women?

Cos they're playas.

What did the Spanish farmer say to his chickens?

Oh-lay!

What do you call a little pepper in Spanish?

A jalapequeno

How do you say unicorn in Spanish?

Unamaize

Why do Spanish tests take so long?

Because of all the ese questions.

What did the Spanish firefighter name his twin sons?

Jose and Hose B

Why do Spanish men get half price movie tickets?

They take the senor discount.

Why did the Spanish man's boat sink?

Ola

How do you say goodbye to two people in Spanish?

Adidos!

How do you spell "nose" is Spanish?

Nose

How do you spell socks in Spanish?

Eso si que es.

What did the Spanish guidance counselor tell his students?

You have to have gooooooaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllssssssssss!!!!!

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Why was Santa sacked two days before Christmas?

Elf and safety

How are Americans and poles similar?

Running into one could really ruin your day.

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What's Rihanna's favorite love song?

I can't feel my face when i'm with you

What do you tell someone who feels that life has shorted them from a purpose or calling?

You belong.

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What do Chinese people do when they have an erection?

They vote

What do Chinese people call Chinese food?

Food.

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Why are jerks nice sometimes?

Standard deviation of the mean (OC, as far as I know)

What do you call a deer that likes rain?

A rain-deer. I know it's terrible.

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Why do blondes drive BMWs?

A1: Because they can spell it. A2: Because they can spell BWM.

What do you call a ship that drives itself?

Auto-pirate.

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What did the doctors office say to the hurricane?

Sorry, we don't take any Joaquins

What kind of name is Joaquin?

It's not Russian

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