Monkey Fall Jokes

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was drunk Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

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Why did the monkey fall of the tree?

Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? Why did the third monkey fall of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs?

Matt

How much did the skeleton charge for his excellent legal services?

An arm and a leg.

Knock Jokes More Knock Jokes

What did the blonde say when she knocked over a priceless Ming vase?

A. "It's okay Daddy I'm not hurt."

What is black and knocking on the window from the inside?

A baby in the oven.

Laugh Jokes More Laugh Jokes

What are your symptoms?

I can't laugh and I can't sing. I'm finding it hard to do anything!

Why did the boy laugh when he was molested by a test?

Because the testicles

Second Monkey Jokes More Second Monkey Jokes

Why did the monkey fall of the tree?

Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? Why did the third monkey fall of the tree? Peer pressure.

How'd the monkey fall out of the tree. He was dead. How'd the next second monkey fall out of the tree?

He was stapled to the first monkey! How'd the Third monkey fall out of the tree. Peer Pressure.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did Kermit the Frog say after Jim Hensen died?

Nothing...

Why do hipsters never die?

Because everyone does that already.

Lucy Jokes More Lucy Jokes

What happens when Lucy starts using 100% of her brain?

She's almost as smart as a man.

Why did Lucy fall off the monkey bars?

She's got no arms Me: Knock Knock Them: Whose there Me: Not Lucy.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What do you call the second-most hated politician in America?

Madam President.

What's the reason my shower isn't working?

You have only one second to guess the answer. No pressure.

Idiot Jokes More Idiot Jokes

Which perfume do you use?

It smells good. I want to buy one for my wife." Lady: "Please don't. Some idiot will have an excuse to talk to her."

What do a burnt pizza and a baby have in common?

Some idiot pulled it out to late