Rolling Stone Jokes

What's a racists favorite song by The Rolling Stones?

Paint it, black!

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Why didn't Mick Jagger pick Randy Moss up from the airport?

Because a Rolling Stone gathers no Moss.

Which band does rockclimbers listen to?

Rolling Stones

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and Scotsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey, you, get off of my cloud." A Scotsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe."

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scottish shepard?

The Stones say "hey you get off of my cloud!" The Shepard says "hey Mc Cloud get of of my ewe!"

What is a rock's favorite band?

The Rolling Stones.

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scottsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!" And a Scottsman says "Hey McLeod, get of me ewe!"

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scottish sheep farmer?

One says, 'Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!' The other says 'Hey! MacLeod! Get off of my ewe.'

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scot?

One says "hey, you, get off of my cloud", and the other says "hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe".

What's the difference between a Scotsman and The Rolling Stones?

The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'

What are The Rolling Stones better at than the Bee gees?

Stayin' Alive

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Why did Avogadro have trouble picking up chicks?

Because his number couldn't fit in their phones

Why do rappers love weed so much?

Because the majority of their relatives used to pick it

English Jokes More English Jokes

What dog is always tired in London?

An English sleep dog.

Why was Fam's favorite subject English?

Because it's Lit.

Cloud Jokes More Cloud Jokes

What do Bill Gates and the Pope have in common?

They've both put their faith in the cloud.

Why aren't Japanese optimistic?

Because not every cloud has a silver lining

Scotsman Jokes More Scotsman Jokes

What did the Scotsman say when he went for another drink?

Hey, where'd my Glascow

Why was the Scotsman buried on the hill?

He died.

Mac Leod Jokes More Mac Leod Jokes

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish shepherd?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" The other says, "Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe!

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What did Medusa call the sheep she turned to stone?

Baaaaasalt

What's the difference between a drunk driver, and a stoned driver?

The drunk driver will drive right through a stop sign. The stoned driver will stop and wait for it to turn green.

Hey Jokes More Hey Jokes

How do you sell a chicken to someone who is hard-of-hearing?

HEY!!! DO YOU WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN!?!?!?!

What is the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!". The other says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!".

Paint Jokes More Paint Jokes

What is the difference between Jesus and a painting?

You only need a nail to hang a painting.

How do you catch a green elephant?

Paint him red and catch him with the red elephant trap.