Cloud Jokes

What do you call people that you hate?

Clouds, because once they are gone it's a beautiful day.

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Why was Cloud trying to cheer up Sky?

He looked a little blue

Why did the drunk guy call the sheep Legolas?

Because it was a cloud

Why do clouds make good Kings?

Because they have rain over every country in the world.

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scottish shepard?

The Stones say "hey you get off of my cloud!" The Shepard says "hey Mc Cloud get of of my ewe!"

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish shepherd?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" The other says, "Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe!

What do clouds wear under their pants?

Thunderwear!

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish Highlander?

Mick Jagger sings, "Hey you, get off of my cloud.. ", while the Scottish Highlander yells, "Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says "Hey (hey) you (you) get off of my cloud..." the Scottish farmer says "Hey McCloud get off of my ewe"

What do Bill Gates and the Pope have in common?

They've both put their faith in the cloud.

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What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scottsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!" And a Scottsman says "Hey McLeod, get of me ewe!"

Why do Transformers always have their heads in the clouds?

They're robots in da skies.

What do clouds wear under their clothes?

Thunderware.

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scottish sheep farmer?

One says, 'Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!' The other says 'Hey! MacLeod! Get off of my ewe.'

What did one cloud of fog say to the other?

I don't know. It's a Mistery.

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

Why did the cloud get $10M for having a fight?

He was the raining champion.

Where do lightning bolts go on dates?

To cloud 9

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scot?

One says "hey, you, get off of my cloud", and the other says "hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe".

What cloud is so lazy because it will not get up?

Fog

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What kind of shorts do clouds wear?

Thunderwear.

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottsman?

Mick Jagger says "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" A Scottsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

Why are clouds like jockeys?

Because they hold the reins!

What does that cloud look like to you?

3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be 3-year-old: Rain.

What do clouds wear during a storm?

Thunderwear

What's the difference between a Scotsman and The Rolling Stones?

The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish sheep herder?

One says, "hey, you! Get off my cloud!", and the other one says, "hey, McCloud! Get off of my ewe!"

What is the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!". The other says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!".

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'

Why was the Sun mad at all the clouds?

Because they kept throwin shade

What do clouds want to be when they grow up?

Thunderstorms

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

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With a drum machine you only have to punch the instructions in once

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Because he thinks they're part of the illumi-naughty

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What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish Highlander?

Mick Jagger sings, "Hey you, get off of my cloud.. ", while the Scottish Highlander yells, "Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says "Hey (hey) you (you) get off of my cloud..." the Scottish farmer says "Hey McCloud get off of my ewe"

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Why did the kid throw the watch out the window?

So time would fly.

What happens when you stick your hand into a jar of jelly beans?

The black ones steal your watch and the yellow ones paint your nails.

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Why are you always tired, Dad?

My 3-year-old asked as she woke me from a nap by poking me in the eye.

Why did the 3 year old go to jail?

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What did the man say when he couldn't get the gun to fire?

Looks like I'm gonna have to read the trouble shooting section of the manual.

Why don't lawyers play hide-and-seek?

Nobody will look for them.

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What does a Scottish cat say?

Mee yew!

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'