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Traffic Jokes

Why did the chicken run out into traffic?

To get to the other side.

Your Age Is Only Math
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Why is there only a stairway to heaven but a highway to hell?

Easy. More traffic is going to hell.

What do you call a deaf Pokémon go player walking into traffic?

Anything you want they're not going to hear you.

What's worse than being stuck in traffic behind a driver that's vaping?

Realizing that your being intently watched for your reaction to their sic clouds - BEST RECOGNIZE!

What did the guy on LSD say while driving on the highway?

Woah, the traffic is moving.

What do you call traffic in The Czech Republic?

Praguetory

What did the Egyptian Pharaoh do when he got caught in traffic?

ANKH ANKH!!

What's the best thing about North Korea?

The traffic.

What do you call an Oyster who is stuck in traffic?

A PearlJam

Who is the brother of Juan Luna?

Edi si AnTWOnio Luna. Yeah yeah, the result of being stuck in the traffic.

What do cows do in traffic?

They moove

Love
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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop a bull from charging?

Take away his credit card.

When are YOU going to start having kids?

Me: When are you going to stop

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between jelly and jam?

Nobody would name their band Pearl Jelly.

What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?

Beer nuts are a dollar fifty. Deer nuts are always under a buck...

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why are you just telling me now?

He said, Because I couldn't stop laughing.

What do monkeys sleep on?

Apricots. I used to love this joke when I was a little kid and told it over and over. I'm still a little in love with it for that reason. What are some of your favorite jokes from when you were a little kid?

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What's WRONG with me?

I named 6 things before I realized it was a rhetorical question.

What's worse than fighting an uphill battle?

Getting to the top and realizing it's all downhill from there.

Highway Jokes More Highway Jokes

What did the guy on LSD say while driving on the highway?

Woah, the traffic is moving.

Why did the guy get aroused by the highway?

Because there were lots of turn ons.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What kind of car does Yoda drive?

A Toy-Yoda

What type of car does a Loch Ness Monster Drive?

A nissan

Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

Why did the chicken go to the car dealership?

She wanted to trade the coop for a sedan..

What's the difference between an expensive purchase and a loud noise that scares a chicken?

One costs an arm and a leg. The other caused alarm and an egg.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

Whatcha doing on the PC?

Daughter: Looking at peckers. M: WHAT! D: Science project on chickens. M: Oh. D: You walked RIGHT into that.

What do rodents do after dinner?

Gopher a walk.