Traffic Jokes

Why did the chicken run out into traffic?

To get to the other side.

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Why is there only a stairway to heaven but a highway to hell?

Easy. More traffic is going to hell.

What do you call a deaf Pokémon go player walking into traffic?

Anything you want they're not going to hear you.

What's worse than being stuck in traffic behind a driver that's vaping?

Realizing that your being intently watched for your reaction to their sic clouds - BEST RECOGNIZE!

What did the guy on LSD say while driving on the highway?

Woah, the traffic is moving.

What do you call traffic in The Czech Republic?

Praguetory

What did the Egyptian Pharaoh do when he got caught in traffic?

ANKH ANKH!!

What's the best thing about North Korea?

The traffic.

What do you call an Oyster who is stuck in traffic?

A PearlJam

Who is the brother of Juan Luna?

Edi si AnTWOnio Luna. Yeah yeah, the result of being stuck in the traffic.

What do cows do in traffic?

They moove

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Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why is owning a Prius difficult?

It's hard to drive when you're patting yourself on the back all the time.

Who drives it?

The officer.

Driver Jokes More Driver Jokes

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?

What did the New York Salmon say to the driver?

I'm swimming here!

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

Who's winning Went to visit my Granddad. He was watching a basketball game. "What's the score Gramps?

92 to 86." "Who's winning " I asked. "92"

What gets bigger each time I watch a stripper?

My debt.

Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway?

What could go wrong " My son apparently

What do Atilla the Hun and John the Baptist have in common?

Their middle name.

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard?

4 or 5.

How many Bros does it take to change a lightbulb?

None cuz it's already lit af

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What's the difference between a rabbit on a treadmill and a rabbit with a carrot stuck up its nose?

One is a fit bunny and the other is a bit funny

What do you call a man with a shovel stuck in his head?

An ambulance because that is a serious medical emergency that requires immediate attention.

Stairway Jokes More Stairway Jokes

Why did the guitar shop fail a fire safety inspection?

No Stairway.

Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway?

What could go wrong " My son apparently

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it?

Irrelevant.

How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb?

Depends what you want it to change into...