An old man yelling at the cloud
Liberty
I want to hang by myself for a bit. Edit: Not suicidal. Just gallows humor.
They can't deal with attachments.
3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.
Because they don't understand how to use Logic or Reason.
Thunderwear
Because he didn't want toupee.
An old man!
Deleted
Me: Because they keep sending emails after unsubscribing. Cop: You're free to go.
Hearing AIDS.
He was a little shellfish
Two. One to change it and one to yell "Ta-daa!" when he's done.
She yelled. "It's part of the design," I said, opening up my wardrobe, "Look, I have the entire collection."
Grandpa: Oh you know with my hands mostly.
Grandpa having a seizure. Bonus: Statistically speaking, 1 in 5 adult men
Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen
Is there a terrorist mobile tariff I can go on