Email Jokes

How do Buddhist monks send emails?

They remove all attachments.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Why can't you email a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are not allowed.

What is a rapper's favorite Email?

Gmail

What's the difference beetwen public official and private employee?

Private employee starts work checking email. Public official starts works making a coffee.

How do you email a sandwich?

In bytes.

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

Why can't you email a picture to a jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

How do Itallian chefs swap emails?

By spaghett-e-mail!

Why couldn't Hillary rig the election like she rigged the DNC?

She deleted that email.

Why can't you email jokes to a jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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How does Dalai Lama send emails?

With no attachments.

What folder do emails from histrionic venture capitalists go in?

Deleted

How do you call it when you get a eMail from a Women?

FeMail.

Why did you burn that building down?

Me: Because they keep sending emails after unsubscribing. Cop: You're free to go.

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Real Thing Jokes More Real Thing Jokes

What's the difference between a picture of Jesus and the real thing?

The picture of Jesus only takes one nail to hang up.

Real Reason Jokes More Real Reason Jokes

What's the real reason Mr. Clean is always smiling?

He likes it dirty.

What's the real reason Lego Movie didn't get nominated for an Oscar?

They thought it was called "The Leo Movie".

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

What Do You Call it When Someone Steals Someone Else's Coffee?

A Mugging.

What's a a magician's favorite kind of coffee?

100% abracadabra

Byte Jokes More Byte Jokes

How do you send a sandwich to someone on a computer?

In bytes

What do you call a digital tree?

All bark and no byte

Hillary Email Jokes More Hillary Email Jokes

What does Hillary's emails and a racist post have in common?

Removed

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What did the zombie say when he walked into the wrong tomb?

I have made a grave mistake.

What did the ant say when he walked into the insurance office?

Insure ants?

Sandwich Jokes More Sandwich Jokes

What do vampires make sandwiches out of?

Self-raising dead.

What is the difference between a robot and a sandwich?

Everything. These two objects have nothing in common.

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

How do you make a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the oven at three fifty tree fiddy until it's Bill Withers. Edit:summoning happened.

How do you know a homeless woman is menstruating?

If she's only wearing one sock. (This joke brought to you courtesy the homeless guy outside my local 7-11.) Edit: tweaked the punchline.