Attachment Jokes

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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How do Buddhist monks send emails?

They remove all attachments.

Why couldn't the Buddha hoover under the sofa?

Because he had no attachments

Why can't Buddhists vacuum in corners?

Because they don't have attachments!

Why can't Buddhists vacuum under the couch?

Because they have no attachments.

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

Why do buddhist make bad vacuum salesman?

They can't deal with attachments.

When is it okay for monks to use e-mail?

When there are no attachments

Why don't Buddhists vacuum in the corners of the monastery?

Because they have no attachments.

How does Dalai Lama send emails?

With no attachments.

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What is the definition of a Wife?

An attachment you screw on the bed to get the housework done.

Why didn't the Buddhist monk vacuum under his couch?

He had no attachments.

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Jedi Jokes More Jedi Jokes

What do you say to a Jedi who stole your sicilian dessert?

You owe me one cannoli.

Why are Jedis allowed to use negative numbers?

Because only Siths deal in absolutes.

Upload Jokes More Upload Jokes

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

Why is ur wife shouting at you?

Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What's a dogs favorite part of a tree?

Stick? BARK!

What do you call a book club that has been stuck on the same book for thousands of years?

Church.

Buddhist Monk Jokes More Buddhist Monk Jokes

Why do Buddhist monks have such sour faces?

Because they're acetic.

Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why didn't Jesus get into college?

Because he got nailed on the boards.

Why does Jesus Jaywalk?

Because he hates crosswalks

Old Man Jokes More Old Man Jokes

Why doesn't an old man ever go down on his old wife?

Ever opened a grilled-cheese sandwich?

What are you going to be when you get out of school?

An old man!

Aww Jokes More Aww Jokes

Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

Vacuum Jokes More Vacuum Jokes

What do nature and dogs have in common?

They both abhor a vacuum.

Why can't Buddhists vacuum in corners?

Because they don't have attachments!