Buddha Jokes

What did the cremated Buddha who was placed in a cardboard box say?

I'm in light urn.'

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Why couldn't the Buddha hoover under the sofa?

Because he had no attachments

What did Buddha say to the Pizza guy?

Make me one with everything.

What kind of hotdog did the Buddha order from the street vendor?

One with everything

Who do you think was smarter, Jesus or Buddha?

I mean, just in terms of not letting themselves get crucified.

What happened to the religious idol when it was put up at auction?

It was sold to the highest Buddha.

Who's there! Buddha! Buddha who?

Buddha this slice of bread for me!

What kind of pizza does Buddha like?

One with everything.

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

Who has the most karma on Reddit?

Buddha.

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Crumple Jokes More Crumple Jokes

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

What should we call this portable computer?

SOME GUY: Laptop everyone applauds...w/ tears in my eyes i crumple a paper that says Kneeputer

Auction Jokes More Auction Jokes

What do you call 5 black guys on a stage?

An auction

What happened to the religious idol when it was put up at auction?

It was sold to the highest Buddha.

Bug Jokes More Bug Jokes

Why don't other bugs like earwigs?

Because they are always earwigging their conversations!

Why wasn't there a Captain America movie tie in videogame?

Because every time one bug was fixed, 2 more appeared.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why couldn't Jesus play marbles?

Because they kept falling through his hands.

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

Because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

Sell Jokes More Sell Jokes

Why was the black man selling drugs?

He was a pharmacist.

What does a lingerie store and a guitar store have in common?

They both sell G-strings

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

What type of dog suffers from being inbred?

A hotdog

Why are people who suffers from insomnia so excited at the moment?

They only have to sleep 3 more times until Christmas

Cardboard Box Jokes More Cardboard Box Jokes

What's the difference between me and a cardboard box?

A cardboard box isn't always empty on the inside.

How do you see that a linedancer came from Belgium and not from the Netherlands?

He wears the cardboard box on his boots.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

How would you describe the average bully?

Mean.

Whats up?

Me:Onion prices. S:You know what I mean,like What's crackin' M:Nutshells. S:Really Fine.What's poppin M:Corn. *Blocked*