Sloth Jokes

Why are sloths so green?

Because they can't move fast enough to flick a booger

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What is a Sloth's favorite breakfast food?

Slothages.

What did Sloth say when he found gold?

AU GUYS!!!

Why are sloths one of the 7 deadly sins?

Those little guys don't hurt anybody. They just chill all day.

Why did Sally the Sloth sleep in all day?

Because her crippling depression leaves her unable to function properly.

What are sloths?

Wrong, What are coworkers

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Flick Jokes More Flick Jokes

Why did Rick Astley get fired from his job at the video store?

Because he refused to rent someone a copy of the Pixar flick "Up".

How many IT guys does it take to change a light bulb?

No IT guys change light bulbs, they just keep flicking the switch on and off again until something happens.

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

What did the scarf say to the hat?

You go on ahead, I am going to hang around a bit longer.

What did the tie say to the neck?

I think I'll just hang around.

Function Jokes More Function Jokes

Why did x and y break up?

They couldn't function together.

What does a Vulcan lawnmower need to function?

A spock plug.

Anybody Jokes More Anybody Jokes

Why shouldn't you kiss anybody on New Years Day?

Because it's the first date.

Why would anybody ever want to visit New Brunswick?

I hear their bowling alleys are pretty nice.

7 Jokes More 7 Jokes

Why are sloths one of the 7 deadly sins?

Those little guys don't hurt anybody. They just chill all day.

What are the 7 Irish drinking holidays?

Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday.

Gold Jokes More Gold Jokes

Whats better than winning gold at the paralympics?

Having legs.....

What's happens to gold when it is exposed to the air?

Pupil: It's stolen!

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What made you leave it?

Well, the movie ended so

What did the rubber ball say when he left the yo-yo's late night house party?

You better get some sleep - I'm gonna bounce!

Coworker Jokes More Coworker Jokes

Why did I join Twitter?

Well I was sick of only being hated by coworkers and family so I wanted to branch out.

How does a boat captain determine his profit?

By using aquadratic equation. (Via my coworker)