Sloth Jokes

Why are sloths so green?

Because they can't move fast enough to flick a booger

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How does a sloth hang itself?

By trying to jump rope.

What is a Sloth's favorite breakfast food?

Slothages.

What did Sloth say when he found gold?

AU GUYS!!!

Why are sloths one of the 7 deadly sins?

Those little guys don't hurt anybody. They just chill all day.

Why did Sally the Sloth sleep in all day?

Because her crippling depression leaves her unable to function properly.

What are sloths?

Wrong, What are coworkers

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Gold Jokes More Gold Jokes

What do liquid Draino and a Dutch stripper have in common?

They both slowly remove clogs.

How do you turn lead into gold?

Start a war.

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

What did the cow say... What did the cow say when she jumped over the barbed wire fence?

I'm udderly ruined!" credit: my grandma, at every party she's ever been to

What did the Japanese man say when he jumped out of Office Depot?

SUPPLIES!!!

Anybody Jokes More Anybody Jokes

Why would anybody ever want to visit New Brunswick?

I hear their bowling alleys are pretty nice.

Why doesn't Mexico have any good athletes?

Because anybody who can run, jump, and swim is already in America

Function Jokes More Function Jokes

Why can't you derivate a social scientist?

Because they don't have a function

Why can't you differentiate liberal arts majors?

They have no function.

Flick Jokes More Flick Jokes

Why are sloths so green?

Because they can't move fast enough to flick a booger

Why did Rick Astley get fired from his job at the video store?

Because he refused to rent someone a copy of the Pixar flick "Up".

Little Guy Jokes More Little Guy Jokes

Why are sloths one of the 7 deadly sins?

Those little guys don't hurt anybody. They just chill all day.

What's the difference between a little guy with a pot o' gold and a big gathering where people's limbs are falling off?

One's a leprechaun and the other's a leper-con.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

How did the jury find the hamburger?

Grill-ty as charred!

Why won't you find any gondolas in the Eternal City?

Because Rome wasn't built in a bay.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why did the AC wave try to hang himself?

He was sinusoidal.

Whats the difference between a hippy chick and a washing machine?

When you drop a load in, it doesn't follow you around for 6 months trying to get spun. 8)