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Strength Jokes

What's your strength?

Candidate: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: What's your weakness? Candidate: Those blue eyes of yours.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why did the bear start playing music when the priest tried to absolve him of his sins?

Because the priest said "Bear, atone" and the bear thought he said "baritone" as in "play the baritone sax now". The bear immediately started wailing away on the sax, rocking back and forth so hard he knocked over all the prayer candles and almost snapped his own spine. All the priest could do was ask the lord for the strength needed to get this bear into heaven.

What are your strengths?

I'm an optimist and a positive thinker." "Give me an example" "When do I start "

How can we get you to walk out of here with 4 tires?

Sir, you are wildly overestimating my strength.

What would you say are your strengths?

Me: Words Him: Can you say more Me: More Him: Me: I'm also good at directions

What strengths do you bring to the job?

Long pause while Jesus glares at interviewer* Are you being serious right now

What are some of your strengths?

Me: Shifting the blame HR: That's a horrible reply Me: No, your question was! HR: Wow, you're good!

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Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

Bare Grylls

What do you call bears without ears?

B.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What do you call a line of rabbits walking backwards?

A receding hare line.

Why so down?

Aquaman: People think I'm not a real superhero. I'm tired of being walked all over. *Jesus enters Aquaman: Dammit!

Annoy Jokes More Annoy Jokes

What's black and red, flashes like hell and annoys men?

Live Jasmine

What kind of noise annoys an oyster?

A noisy noise annoys an oyster! (Try saying that fast!)

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What can you make and break at the same time?

A racket.

Why did the atoms cross the road?

It was time to split.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What's the difference between healthcare.gov and Derrick Rose?

Healthcare.gov was broken and now it works.

What keyboard shortcut is extensively used by journalists who work for Breitbart News?

Alt right

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

How do you get out of a Russian prison?

You have Vladmir Putin a word for you.

What is the best gift you can give your girlfriend for your anniversary?

Nothing. It's a gift she will always remember. Edit: Wording clarified (Thanks to therinnovator).

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

What animal has 5 legs?

A pit bull coming back from the playground.

Why did I break up with my vegan girlfriend?

She refused to swallow animal by-products.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What did the Canadian eel say when the bartender asked him if he'd had enough?

No, I think I'd like some more-ay.

Why is the Math Book so sad?

It has so many problems! -Sorry doing a whole bunch of math today and i thought of this.