Candidate Jokes

What's your strength?

Candidate: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: What's your weakness? Candidate: Those blue eyes of yours.

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What do the NBA and the presidential election have in common?

There's only two candidates, and nobody wants either of them to win!

What's your strongest weakness?

Candidate: ... *Realises stupid question & thinks of cover up M: It's a trick question. You're hired!

Why do you see so many Bernie Posts on r/all?

Because supporters of other candidates are out working or voting.

Which candidate will most improve our country?

2016 election: Which candidate is least likely to start The Purge

What did Bernie Sanders say when he found a dead body at a Democratic Party meeting to select candidates and decide policy?

Oh god, a caucus!" cuz he has a new england accent

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Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed?

To catch her false teeth.

What did the naturalist say when he saw a number of rocks covered in moss?

I'm lichen what I see

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you get when you cross a philosopher, an insomniac and a dyslexic?

A guy who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog. Infinite Jest, by DFW

What does a robot do at the end of one night stand?

He falls off

Purge Jokes More Purge Jokes

What's a bulimic person's favorite movie?

The Purge

What do you call the prequel to The Purge?

The Binge

Weakness Jokes More Weakness Jokes

What would be your main strength?

Well, I can communicate with animals... "Wow, impressive. Any weaknesses " They can't understand me.

What's your strength?

Candidate: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: What's your weakness? Candidate: Those blue eyes of yours.

Support Jokes More Support Jokes

Why don't Muslims support Harambe?

Because it would

Why did so many people support the colonist protest of tea?

Cause everyone wanted'a "boo" tea!

Blue Eye Jokes More Blue Eye Jokes

What do you call someone who has blonde hair, blue eyes and worships the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

A Pastafaryan.

What has blonde hair, blue eyes and tends to ailed animals?

A VeterinArian.

Reduce Jokes More Reduce Jokes

How do you reduce wind-drag on a musician's car?

Take the Domino's Pizza sign off the roof

Why do bad break-dancers get reduced prison sentences?

Time served

Campaign Jokes More Campaign Jokes

Why did Mike Dukakis lose the 1998 Presidential election?

He TANKED his campaign!

How did Vladimir Lenin originally get into power?

This isn't just a campaign, this is a political