Xanax Jokes

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Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

What will you be having to drink?

Harambe: I'll have just ice. Bartender: Just ice Me: Yes, justice for Harambe.

What did the bartender say to the alien?

You're drunk ET, go home!

Hispanic Jokes More Hispanic Jokes

What did the Hispanic fireman name his two twin sons?

Jose and Hose B

What do Hispanic midgets cut their pizza with?

Little Caesar's

Mexican Guy Jokes More Mexican Guy Jokes

Why did the Mexican guy rob a train?

He had a loco motive.

What do you call two Mexican guys playing basketball?

Juan on Juan.

Cinco De Mayo Jokes More Cinco De Mayo Jokes

What's honey mustards least favorite holiday?

Cinco de Mayo

Borderline Personality Disorder Jokes More Borderline Personality Disorder Jokes

What do you call a homeless horse with a Borderline Personality Disorder?

Unstable.

Consume Jokes More Consume Jokes

What did the man who ate a clock say?

That was time consuming but I still want seconds.

Why do whales have really good immune systems?

They consume a lot of vitamin SEA!

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What does a retired hairdresser and a bar of platinum have in common?

They both plat no more.

What does Harry Potter say when he walks into a bar?

I Expectsum Patronum

Allow Jokes More Allow Jokes

Why aren't eagles allowed to be sick in america?

Because that would be illeagle

Who has one thumb and isn't allowed to use the table saw anymore?

This guy.