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How can you tell a hippie's been in your house?

He's still there when you get home. What's he say when you tell him to leave? "Na, 'ma stay"

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

What would happen if Leafy went to The Filthy Frank show?

Chin-chin would leave.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell when a white guy is about to tell a joke?

He glances over his shoulder.

How can you tell Sofia Vergara's children on the playground?

They're the ones with stretch marks on their lips.

House Jokes More House Jokes

When the cat's away.....?

The house smells better!

Why is it I cant get a mobile reception in my house in town, yet a terrorist can upload his vids from a cave in Afganistan?

Is there a terrorist mobile tariff I can go on

Hippie Jokes More Hippie Jokes

Why aren't hippies good pitchers?

Because they're always high and outside.

What would my hippie side be doing right now?

I already know that

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

How do jockeys stay on their horses?

Jockey straps.

Why didn't Princess Diana have very many friends on Xbox Live?

All she does is stay on the dashboard.

Ma Jokes More Ma Jokes

What did the amputee say to his mom when he learned to ride a bike?

Look ma, no hands!

What do you call someone who does a BA in Arts, a MA in English and a PhD in Gender Studies?

A well educated Barista