How to blind parachutist know they're close to the ground?

The feel the leash go slack! (heard this one while listening to some Irish tunes)

This joke may have profanity.
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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's that over there?

I don't know but I just got a raging clue

What is my girlfriend's favorite meal?

A dish called: "I don't know, you choose."

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What do you call feeling bad about watching lame reality TV shows?

Survivor guilt.

What's being in love feel like?

You know when someone cancels plans you wanted to cancel anyway Almost as good as that.

Listen Jokes More Listen Jokes

What's the best music to listen to while stoned?

Rock.

What happens if you cross a parrot with a Gorilla?

Nobody is sure but if it opened its mouth to speak you'd listen!

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Where'd ya get it?

The parrot says, "Africa." (I don't know if you know this one, but I just heard it today)

What do you call a group of millionaires sitting around watching the NBA finals?

The Lakers. (Laker fan here. Sorry prob would have been more appropriate last week during the finals.) Edit: I heard this some where the other day. I can't take credit for the joke.

Blind Jokes More Blind Jokes

Why don't blind people like to skydive?

Because it scares the dog.

What do you get if you watch the Blind Side backwards?

Oher's NFL career

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What do you call an Irish sniper?

Amon

What does an Irish terrorist attack and a gambling addiction have in common?

Dublin down

Ground Jokes More Ground Jokes

How much electricity is in the ground?

1 Terrahertz

Why did the guitarist leave his guitar on the ground?

It didn't have any pickups

Leash Jokes More Leash Jokes

What do you call a pig on a leash?

Pulled Pork

What kind of leash should you buy for a Chihuahua?

A short one!

Slack Jokes More Slack Jokes

How does a blind skydiver know the ground is near?

The leash goes slack.

Why should you never let a non-metal drive a train?

Because they're poor conductors! (I know they're called Engineers but cut me some slack, I thought of this in the 9th grade.)