I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.

I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How many disappointments can you fit into a van?

I don't know, I can't get them outside of the house.

What do you call it when a deer knows karate?

Tae-fawn-doe

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What's the most important meal of the day to help you lose pounds?

Brexit

What's a gambler's favorite time of day?

10 to 1.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why do all the best golfers keeping buying socks?

They get a hole in one!

Who would still buy a Note 7 after all the controversy?

A Muslim

Shoe Jokes More Shoe Jokes

How do you always keep your shoes tied?

Replace the laces with earphones.

What do you call a shoe with no grip?

A slipper. (Made this up today, but almost definitely will have been made up before by someone else)

Drug Dealer Jokes More Drug Dealer Jokes

What does the drug dealer make sure to do?

Weed out only the best suppliers

Why did the undercover cop throw a wasp nest at the drug dealer?

It was a sting operation.

Trip Jokes More Trip Jokes

What did the French man say when he tripped down the stairs?

Eiffel.

Why do elephants hide behind trees?

To trip ants.

Lace Jokes More Lace Jokes

How do you always keep your shoes tied?

Replace the laces with earphones.

What do you say to your laces to make them go away?

Shoo laces