What do a Boston Marathon runner and Jesus have in common?

Nails in their hands and feet

This joke may have profanity.

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Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What does the 'H' in Jesus 'H' Christ stand for?

Haploid

Why did the foot smile?

He was toe very happy. Jesus that is awful.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

Because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

Why is Jesus bad at hockey?

He always gets nailed to the boards.

Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What kind of nuts go on your feet?

Cashews.

What is it like, to be standing at the foot of an empty grave, not knowing who will one day be in it?

Unbereavable.

Boston Marathon Jokes More Boston Marathon Jokes

Why did the Boston Marathon runner collapse before finishing the race?

WTF) His thighs were burning too bad.

What has 3 heads, 2 legs, and 4 arms?

The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why did the man break the clock?

He wasn't comfortable with having that much time on his hands.

What happens when you stick your hand into a jar of jelly beans?

The black ones steal your watch and the yellow ones paint your nails.