What happened did someone try to break into your house?

Me: No. My gf said we needed to talk

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

Who do Egyptians pray to when the public transportation breaks down?

Anubis.

Why did the two most senior nuns in the convent break up a German terror plot to steal millions in bearer bonds?

Old habits die hard

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad away

How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?

Depends on what tune the Devil happens to be playing. Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why can't you trust a garbage man who loves his job?

Because he's always talking trash.

What do you call a yak that wants to talk to you about a network marketing opportunity?

A cognac

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why are you studying your Easter candy?

I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!

How do you go about hiring a horse?

Try two pairs of stilts!

House Jokes More House Jokes

What happened to the fireman who let the house burn?

He got fired.

What do hand grenades and wives have in common?

Remove the ring and your house is gone.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for a cat?

Cats can't drive!

Why does a rapper need an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

Gf Jokes More Gf Jokes

What's a GF?

Mom:if you are a good boy,you will get one when you're older. Son:What if i'm not a good boy? Mom:You'll get many.

What's the difference between an elevator and a redditor?

An elevator has a GF