What's the difference between toilet paper and a knife?

Oh, you don't know I won't ask you to wipe my bum then.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between the stock market and women?

With the stock market you can only lose when you pull out.

What's the difference between America and Saudi Arabia?

You don't need a computer to play minesweeper in Saudi Arabia. (I'm not sorry)

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the most dangerous animal in Africa?

Black people. (Slightly Racist I know)

How do we know God's not a woman?

We're not sandwiches.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How do you make an ugly baby?

Ask your parents.

What's so funny?

Asks the dermatologist. "Sorry, it's a inside joke." replies the surgeon.

Toilet Paper Jokes More Toilet Paper Jokes

What do the U.S.S. Enterprise and Toilet Paper have in common?

They both wipe out Klingons.

Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?

It didn't want to get stuck in any cracks.

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

What makes you think this is steak?

While I stroked his thigh with a knife.

What did the knife say to the potato?

Now I've got to cut you.

Bum Jokes More Bum Jokes

What's the difference between toilet paper and a knife?

Oh, you don't know I won't ask you to wipe my bum then.

What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?

He wiped his bum.

Wipe Jokes More Wipe Jokes

What's it called when you're using Tinder on the toilet?

Swiping and wiping.

What does German goalkeeper Manuel Neuer call it when he takes a dump and there is nothing on the toilet paper after wiping?

A clean sheet.