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Whats the last thing you want to see when youre shagging the wife?

The husband.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why are Vampires Democrats?

They want Gore in 2000.

Who gets the job of writing the fortunes in the cookies?

I want that job. I could really screw with some people.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the wife say as she left her Mexican husband?

I'm sorry but I love another Juan.

What do you get if you play a country music song backwards?

You get your wife back. Your house back. Your truck back. Your dog back...

S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats Harry Potters favourite way of getting down a hill?

Walking. JK ROLLING

Whats the month people get most drunk in?

Febrewery

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why can't you tell pun jokes to kleptomaniacs?

Because they always take things literally

Why do men stare at a woman's breasts?

To prove they can focus on two things at once.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What gift do you want?

HUSBAND: "An English girl." After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: "Where is my gift " WIFE: "Wait for nine months!"

Why was the wife worried that her husband was a light drinker?

Every night, he'd go out and drink until it was light.

Shag Jokes More Shag Jokes

Whats the last thing you want to see when youre shagging the wife?

The husband.

What did the geologist say to his girlfriend before shagging her?

I am going to make the bedrock.