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Why did the bear run around his bed?

He wanted to catch up on his sleep.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why does a Belgian take a stone and a flashlight to bed?

The stone to throw the lights out, the flashlight to check if the lights are really out

What's long and hard every time you wake up?

Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the guy cut a hole in his carpet?

He wanted to watch the floor show. And why did he cover it back up...He realized that he didn't want to watch the "hole" show.

Why did the farmer put brandy in the cow's food?

He wanted to raised stewed beef!

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

What service do you get if you sleep in a bakery?

Bread and Bakedfast!

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What do you call The Bear who loves philosophy?

Winnie the Philosopooh

Why were the overly polite twins almost never born?

After you." "No, after you."

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

How did Princess Aurora catch her prince?

She became a sleeper agent

What bait do you use to catch a space fish?

A worm hole

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Why doesn't Mexico have a good Olympic team?

Because all the ones that can run, jump and swim are already in America.

Why did the ram run off the cliff?

He didn't see the ewe turn.