Why do we have to sit at red lights if nobody's coming the other way?

We don't have to pay our taxes if nobody's checking, right

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

How many Buddhists does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, change comes from within.

How can you tell if a hippy came to your house?

He's still there.

Red Light Jokes More Red Light Jokes

What's that pig doing in the middle of the road with a red light on its head?

Didn't you tell me to put out a stop swine

Why do we have to sit at red lights if nobody's coming the other way?

We don't have to pay our taxes if nobody's checking, right

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

How much do pirates pay for piercings?

A buccaneer!

What did you do today?

Mum: Well, the builders that moved the garage came over and I paid them for their work done.

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How does Sean Connery find his way to the toilet?

With a shat nav.

Where is the remote?

All the way over there." "Guess I'm watching this."

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What do you call a group of millionaires sitting around watching the NBA finals?

The Lakers. (Laker fan here. Sorry prob would have been more appropriate last week during the finals.) Edit: I heard this some where the other day. I can't take credit for the joke.

How do you get 4 girls to sit on one chair?

You flip it upside down.

Taxis Jokes More Taxis Jokes

When my girlfriend asks "mom, what are you doing!?

I reply "Taxes."

How many Republicans does it take to raise your taxes?

None. The Democrats do that.