Why don't house painters wear wedding rings on the job?

Nobody wants to marry an underemployed alcoholic.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Aladdin. Aladdin who?

Aladdin the street wants a word with you!

Do you want a brief explanation of what an acorn is?

In a nutshell, it's an oak tree.

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What's the difference between a good friend and a really good friend?

A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!

What's the difference between a toilet and a sink?

Aaaand you're not allowed in my house anymore.

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What do you get if you cross a Boxer and a Painter?

Mohammed Dali

What did the painter say to her boyfriend?

I love you with all my art!

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Why did Holden Caulfield hate his job at Sprint?

He was surrounded by phone-ys!

Why did the concrete fail at its job?

It couldn't take the shear stress

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Why did the Geometry major marry a Brit?

Because she was a cute angle.

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Will i marry you?

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What dog wears a white coat and does science experiments?

Labs!

Why don't house painters wear wedding rings on the job?

Nobody wants to marry an underemployed alcoholic.

Wedding Ring Jokes More Wedding Ring Jokes

Why don't house painters wear wedding rings on the job?

Nobody wants to marry an underemployed alcoholic.

What does the date inside of a wedding ring stand for?

Best before...