Why don't I have a boyfriend?

God: I sent you one, you dumped him for putting ketchup on his steak. Me: Ah. That's right. Gross.

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Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

Why was the 6'6" guy so brokenhearted after his 4'9" girlfriend dumped him?

He was nuts over her.

Whats the difference between a girl and a washing machine?

When I dump a load in the washing machince, it doesnt follow me around

Boyfriend Jokes More Boyfriend Jokes

What does a feminist get when she can't afford a punching bag?

A boyfriend.

Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?

He was a boar.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

What happens when you run away from tomatos?

They ketchup.

Why is ketchup married to mustard?

Cause ketchup accidentally broke the condiment.

Send Jokes More Send Jokes

How do you sabotage a space mission?

Send Matt Damon

Why were there so many Hawaiian lei's at the funeral?

The obituary read "Please send donations in luau flowers."

Steak Jokes More Steak Jokes

What food do vampires hate?

Steaks.

What do you call it when you accidentally butcher your heifer instead of your steer?

A Ms. Steak.