Beaker Jokes

Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?

He touched the beaker before it was cool.

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Why were the Beakers all packed and moved out of the university lab?

They were graduated

Who's the most self-centered Muppet?

Beaker. All he says is "Me Me Me."

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Graduate Jokes More Graduate Jokes

Who is a Graduate student's least favorite Greek Hero?

Thesus

What do you call a Med School student who graduates with all C's?

A Doctor.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What's the difference between a washing machine and a virgin?

A washing machine doesn't follow the guy around for 2 weeks after he drops a load in it.

What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?

Cowboom!

Douchebag Jokes More Douchebag Jokes

Pack Jokes More Pack Jokes

Why is there a wolf in the smoke shop?

He's just looking for a pack.

What does a man consider to be a seven course meal?

A hot dog and a six pack.

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

What u doing?

Math, it's due Friday" *I slowly crumple the paper and put it in my mouth* They'll never believe u

What's the best thing about dating a homeless woman?

When ur done, u can drop her off anywhere.

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

What do people do when a chemist dies?

They barium.

Why did some chemists go broke?

The bond market crashed.

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

How many dead-heads does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They just let it burn out and follow it around for twenty years.

How many anti-social teens does it take to ignore a burned-out light bulb?

None of your business!

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

How do you know it's midnight at the Neverland Ranch?

The big hand's touching the little hand.

What's up Dad Party!" dads go nuts "I wanna know, IS IT GETTING HOT IN HERE?

Dads in unison DON'T TOUCH THE THERMOSTAT