Chelsea Jokes

What do you get when 42 goes into 45?

Chelsea.

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What do you get when you cross a crooked lawyer with a crooked politician?

Chelsea.

What is the difference between Chelsea and Leo di caprio?

Chelsea got Oscar. huehuehuehue.

Why is Bill infuriated with Chelsea's new private school?

They broke family tradition by making her wear a uniform.

Why did Bill and Hillary send Chelsea to a private school?

If they sent her to a public school the secret service would be out-gunned!

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Gun Jokes More Gun Jokes

Where do you think you're going at this hour?

Gun hangs head & turns around

What happened to the gun that kept randomly shooting?

He got fired.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why is Santa Claus always a man?

Because no woman will wear same dress year after year for same occasion.

Why did the groom ask his bride to wear white?

Because he wanted his dishwasher to match the fridge and stove

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What does it take to break a Nokia phone?

Microsoft.

Why is an egg like a young horse?

Because it can't be used until it's broken!

Leo Jokes More Leo Jokes

When is the closest Leo will get to an Oscar?

When he takes out the trash

What is the difference between Chelsea and Leo di caprio?

Chelsea got Oscar. huehuehuehue.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How did Watson and crick blow their chance with a hot girl?

They said, "baby you'd look good if you got a pair of skinny genes"

Why were people angry wen the chiken crossed the rd?

Cus he looked one way, then another way after.

45 Jokes More 45 Jokes

What's the difference between the charismatics and the nacists?

Why are your eyes dilated?

Me: "Your eyes dilate up to 45% when you look at something you love" Mom: "What were you looking at " Me: "Memes"

Private School Jokes More Private School Jokes

Why did Bill and Hillary send Chelsea to a private school?

If they sent her to a public school the secret service would be out-gunned!

What do you call the Skunk who wears khaki's and goes to private school?

Preppy le Pew

Uniform Jokes More Uniform Jokes

What does it take for a soldier in uniform to pick up a girl?

A smile and wave!

Where did the team get there uniforms?

New Jersey