45 Jokes

What do you get when 42 goes into 45?

Chelsea.

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What's the difference between the charismatics and the nacists?

What is 32% black, 45% white......gets lit up and changes to blue and red at night?

Chicago.

Why are your eyes dilated?

Me: "Your eyes dilate up to 45% when you look at something you love" Mom: "What were you looking at " Me: "Memes"

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Elf Jokes More Elf Jokes

What do you call an elf that's afraid of Jethro Tull?

10:45

What does Santa say to the elves after they make the toys?

Leave my presents

Cost Jokes More Cost Jokes

What does it cost a pirate to get his ear pierced?

About a Buccaneer (buck-an-ear) yuck...yuck...yuck

What is the cost of plastic surgery?

Doctor: It is near about 10,000$. Patient: Well, what if we arrange the plastic

Nickelback Jokes More Nickelback Jokes

How many Nickelback fans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Trick question! There's no such thing as Nickelback fans. (I will be hated by few)

Why did the crowd riot at the Nickelback concert?

Because they didn't get their nickel back.

Chelsea Jokes More Chelsea Jokes

What do you get when you cross a crooked lawyer with a crooked politician?

Chelsea.

What do you get when 42 goes into 45?

Chelsea.

Prefer Jokes More Prefer Jokes

What gas do snails prefer?

Shell.

Why do ladies prefer 77 over 69?

Because it's eight more.

Gut Jokes More Gut Jokes

Why didn't the T-rex skeleton attack the museum visitors?

Because she had no guts!

Why didn't the skeleton ask out the Zombie to go to the Halloween party?

He didn't have the guts

Cancer Jokes More Cancer Jokes

What's the easiest way to get gum out of your hair?

Cancer

What's the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?

Cancer...

3000 Jokes More 3000 Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist?

Ask him/her to pronounce unionized

What's the difference between 8:45 am and 10:45 am?

Around 3000 people