Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

Previous Random Joke Next

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?

A Holly Davidson!

What does Santa and his elves listen to in their Christmas workshop?

WRAP MUSIC!

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

Why did the hipster decide to drown himself in the tributary?

He didn't want to be mainstream.

When Bruce decides to do stand-up, what will his stage-name be?

Penny Bruce

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

How do fish lose weight?

They Swim-fast.

What did the scale say when it was going to drop a fresh mixtape?

Weight on it.

Hire Jokes More Hire Jokes

Why would he put that on a resume?

Oh. My. God. You're hired.

Why did they hire the police department to design a new superconductor?

STOP RESISTING!!!

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

What is the life motto of a Frenchman?

No gain no pain.

How did robbers gain entry to steal from Miley Cyrus?

They came in like a wrecking ball.

Jared Jokes More Jared Jokes

How did Jared lose 40 pounds?

He dumped his girlfriend

Why did Jared from Subway call Boyz2Men?

He thought they had delivery service.

Mall Jokes More Mall Jokes

What do you call an Autobot who works in an overpriced makeup store at the mall?

Ulta Magnus!

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.