Cougar Jokes

What do you call a Japanese Cougar with exceptional taste?

Umami

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How does a cougar obtain the perfect tan?

She uses a perfect son.

What do you call a cat that claims it's a lion crossed with a cougar?

A liar.

What did the Pope say when a cougar crossed his path?

Oh my gosh I almost Puma pants.

What do John Mellencamp and Ashton Kutcher have in common?

They both picked up a Cougar and then thought better of it.

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Japanese Jokes More Japanese Jokes

What do you get when you combine two Japanese demons?

A two-eyed onion.

What do Japanese people say after a Thanksgiving prayer?

Ra'men.

Path Jokes More Path Jokes

Why should you always rent, rather than buy, a multimeter that measures ohms?

Because it's easier to follow the path of leased resistance.

What did the Pope say when a cougar crossed his path?

Oh my gosh I almost Puma pants.

John Cougar Melon Camp Jokes More John Cougar Melon Camp Jokes

Where did the cantaloupe take his vacation?

John Cougar's Melon Camp

Where do young cantaloupes go in the summer?

John Cougar's Melon Camp

Obtain Jokes More Obtain Jokes

How does a cougar obtain the perfect tan?

She uses a perfect son.

Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures?

Because nurses are taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

Why was that guy yelling at you?

Flashback to me ignoring the "one per customer" sign me with a mouthful of cheese samples No idea

What do you call a guy who does not fart in public?

A private tutor.

Old Woman Jokes More Old Woman Jokes

What do older women wear?

Depends

Why did the doctor make an old woman cry?

He lost his patients

Summer Jokes More Summer Jokes

What do you call a hypnotist that works with wealthy children during the summer?

An heir conditioner.

What did the bear do to be labeled a hipster?

He hibernated in the summer.

Liar Jokes More Liar Jokes

What do you call people who don't repost jokes?

Liars

What do you call a cat that claims it's a lion crossed with a cougar?

A liar.