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Custard Jokes

What do you call a custard when it goes bad?

Off-pudding.

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How's your nutrition?

ME: *dipping my burrito into custard* Not going to lie. It's been worse.

Whats yellow and dangerous?

Shark infested custard

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Shark Jokes More Shark Jokes

How do sharks like their steak?

Whale-done

How is "Shark spotted swimming off the coast" news worthy?

Now if a shark was seen walking off the coast that's different.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know Tiger Woods is one of the richest people in the world?

He plays golf.

What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What did the Mexican do when he arrived in America?

Removed

How does a Mexican cut their pizza?

Little Caesars

Sink Jokes More Sink Jokes

What do you call a sinking ship from BP's Mexico division?

A Pedro leak.

Why is a sinking ship like a person in jail?

Because it needs bailing out.

Dip Jokes More Dip Jokes

What part of Popeye has the smoothest skin?

The part he dips in Olive Oyl.

What do robots dip in salsa?

Microchips

Burrito Jokes More Burrito Jokes

What did the cannibal ask for in his burrito?

Human beans

What does a duck put in its burrito?

Quackamole.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What came first?

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over and says... "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"

How can you tell a lawyer is lying?

Other lawyers look interested.

Infest Jokes More Infest Jokes

What's white, lumpy, and extremely dangerous?

Shark infested mashed potatoes.

Why did Arnold show up at the rodent infested house?

Because he is an ex-Terminator.