Hannibal Lecter Jokes

Why did Hannibal Lecter try DiGiorno's Pizza?

He heard it had de y flavor.

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Why didn't Hannibal Lecter have any friends as a kid?

He was told not to play with his food.

What is Hannibal Lecter's favorite Jane Austen quote?

There is no charm equal to tenderness of heart."**

How does Hannibal Lecter like his eggs?

Ovaries-y

What did Hannibal Lecter say to the philosophy professor after the lecture?

I can smell your Kant.

What movie was made when Hannibal Lecter got Paralysed?

Silence of the Limbs

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Why can't you hear pterodactyls go to the bathroom?

Because dinosaurs went extinct 65 million years ago.

Want to hear a chimney joke?

Got stacks of em! First one's on the house

Deliver Jokes More Deliver Jokes

Why does OP never deliver?

Removed

What does Santa listen to while delivering presents?

Sleigh-er

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?

McBongald's

Why did the lady with multiple personality disorder share her food with a friend?

Because Sharon is Karen.

Heart Jokes More Heart Jokes

What did the pig say when his wife left him?

Don't go bacon my heart

Why did the heart get sent to police station?

Cardiac arrest.

Taste Jokes More Taste Jokes

What is something that tastes better than it smells?

A tongue

What smells better than it taste?

A nose

Lecture Jokes More Lecture Jokes

What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?

A hemogoblin. I came up with this during lecture after a dyslexic moment, thought someone may like it.

What did Hannibal Lecter say to the philosophy professor after the lecture?

I can smell your Kant.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

What does the Doctor say on a one-night stand going wrong?

It's bigger on the inside(http://www.youtube.com/watch v=6zXDo4dL7SU)

Why did a surgeon go to prison?

His medical license was doctored.

Kant Jokes More Kant Jokes

What did Hannibal Lecter say to the philosophy professor after the lecture?

I can smell your Kant.

Why does the philosopher have an automatic car..?

Because he Kant drive Immanuel.