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Hard Feeling Jokes

What did the vet say to the dog he just castrated?

No hard feelings.

We've Got This Love Thing Down

We've Got This Love Thing Down

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the bee say to his wife?

No on knows. It's a Mister Bee.

What did Jared Fogle say when his wife told him she wanted kids?

Me too*

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What happens when a cow jumps over barbed wire?

Udder destruction!

Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

I say: why buy an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why did the dyslexic butcher feel left out?

He felt like he just didn't belong-a (bologna)

How does a tail pipe feel after a long car ride?

Exhausted.

Japanese Girl Jokes More Japanese Girl Jokes

What is the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

You have to drop the bomb twice.

How many tickles does it take to make a Japanese girl laugh?

Ten Tickles

Vet Jokes More Vet Jokes

Why did the bodybuilder go to the vet?

Because his pythons were sick

Why were the vets and pounds mad?

It was raining cats and dogs

Impregnate Jokes More Impregnate Jokes

Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?

In a moooo-tel. I just thought of this sitting in my hotel room. Sometimes I feel like i dad joke so hard I impregnate my girlfriend from 100 miles away.

What did God say to Mary after impregnating her?

Praise the Load

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you call a dyslexic insomniac philosopher?

A person who stays up all night wondering whether or not there is a dog.

What did the vet say to the dog he just castrated?

No hard feelings.

Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

Why did the feminist fail algebra?

She couldn't solve inequalities.

When is a triangle a rectangle?

When it fails