Phelp Jokes

Who robbed Lochte at the Olympics?

Phelps.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why does Michael Phelps refuse to aid his teammates in preparing for the Olympics?

He only Phelps himself.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?

Lets go play on our bikes.

Why divorce now after all this time together?

Woman: We wanted to wait until the kids were dead.

Bacteria Jokes More Bacteria Jokes

How bacteria stay in contact while they're in jail?

They exchange cell numbers.

Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

Brazilian Jokes More Brazilian Jokes

What are Brazilian fans called?

Brazil nuts!

How many armed men does it take to extort an Olympic athlete?

A Brazilian.

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

What do you call a doctor who only swims with his t on?

A Sturgeon

Who's There -Panther -Panther who?

Panther no pants, I'm going swimming!

Medale Jokes More Medale Jokes

What did Lochte say after his teammates told the police what really happened?

And I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

Michael Phelps Jokes More Michael Phelps Jokes

Why does Michael Phelps refuse to aid his teammates in preparing for the Olympics?

He only Phelps himself.

How amazing is Michael Phelps?

He's got like a Brazilian Medals.

Rob Jokes More Rob Jokes

What's wrong honey?

My bad knee is acting up again. *knee robs a gas station*

Why did a Hispanic man rob a train?

He had loco motives!

Black People Jokes More Black People Jokes

Why do black people wear chains?

Nostalgia

Why do black people have white hands and feet?

Because everyone has a little bit of good in them.