Presidency Jokes

Who do you see winning the presidency in 4 years?

I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision.

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What do you call a show about The Donald winning the presidency?

Orange is the New Black

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

Whats happening?

FB=Whats on your mind FourSquare= Where am I Quora=what Youtube=What Im watching. LinkedIn=Whats in it for me

What is the saddest that can happen to Putin's team for the Olympic Games?

To be put out.

U. S. Jokes More U. S. Jokes

Why hasn't Mexico got an Olympic team?

Because the ones who can run, jump and swim are already in the U.S

What U.S. state was founded by Muslims?

Allah-bama

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz.

What happens if Russians fall from an Afghan boat?

They sue Kabul Yacht.

Zimbabwe Jokes More Zimbabwe Jokes

Which country has the most millionaires?

Zimbabwe.

What's the capital of Zimbabwe?

Hyper-inflated.

Jail Jokes More Jail Jokes

What do you call a short physic that has escaped from jail?

A small medium at large

What did Jarod from subway get on his first night in jail?

A foot long

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

How is November's election like the Alien vs Predator movie?

Whoever wins...we lose.

Who won the animal race?

The giraffe and the aardvark were running neck and neck but the aardvark won by a nose!

Lincoln Jokes More Lincoln Jokes

What was Lincoln's worst decision as President?

He should have asked for a table, instead of a Booth

Who was the only president that was not guilty?

Lincoln. He was in a cent.

Elect Jokes More Elect Jokes

What do you call the first black guy elected to the White House?

Precedent.

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.