Purchase Jokes

What did the obese man say about the belt he'd recently purchased?

Top notch.

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How is food purchased an an Irish grocery?

You buy it per-tater

Why did the bachelors purchase double amputee strippers for their party?

Because they were 50% off!

Where do Turkish people go to purchase their furniture?

The Ottoman Empire.

What did the duck say to the cashier after she purchased some lipstick?

Just put it on my bill

What car is so cheap that anyone could purchase it?

A Ford.

What do you call the study of the purchase of tree parts?

Stem sell research.

What did the photocopier say about its favorite purchased song?

That's my pay-per jam.

Why didn't the vampire purchase the expensive suit?

He just couldn't ever see himself wearing it.

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Bachelor Jokes More Bachelor Jokes

What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift?

Exchange him.

What's the difference between a married man and a bachelor?

A bachelor will go to the fridge, sees nothing he wants, and go to bed A married man will go the bed, sees nothing he wants, and go the fridge!

Ottoman Empire Jokes More Ottoman Empire Jokes

Why did the Ottoman empire collapse?

Once your stack of Ottomans gets to a certain height it will fall over.

What's the difference between the inverse of sec(o) and the smallest region in the former Ottoman Empire?

One is cos(o), the other is Kosovo

Isis Jokes More Isis Jokes

What fictional city can ISIS not invade by land?

Gotham City.

What is ISIS?

They are Radical!!! Please don't hurt me....

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

Why did the dog roll down the hill?

It didn t have any legs.

What has four legs and quacks?

A paradox

Allahu Snackbar Jokes More Allahu Snackbar Jokes

Where does a Muslim go for a quick bite?

Allahu Snackbar!

What did the Jihad name his concession stand?

Allahu Snackbar!

Tater Jokes More Tater Jokes

How is food purchased an an Irish grocery?

You buy it per-tater

Cashier Jokes More Cashier Jokes

What do you say to the cashier when you're adamant about using an expired coupon?

Dis counts!!

How much for the best friend?

Manager: Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.

Study Jokes More Study Jokes

What physical trait does a shapely woman who studies statistics have?

Belle curves.

Why did the women's studies major go to college?

To study a broad