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Tissue Jokes

Whats the biggest difference between men and women?

The phrase I went through a whole box of tissues watching that film. is a good place to start.

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How can you tell if someone is having a stroke?

There is lotion and used tissues laying around

What do you call allergy season without any Kleenexes?

A tissue

Why do ghosts carry tissues?

Because they have BOOOOgers.

What do you call a tissue that is sleeping?

A napkin

Why did the skunk buy four boxes of tissues?

Because he had a stinking cold!

Why did the tissue get up and dance?

It had a little boogy in it.

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Lotion Jokes More Lotion Jokes

What kind of lotion does a bullfighter use?

Oil of Ole'

What did justin beiber say to his mom?

I FOUND MY MICROSCOPE, now all I need is my lotion and tweezers

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Helen Keller and Susan B. Anthony?

One doesn't know her place, the other can't find it.

What's the difference between Batman and Blackman?

Batman can go to the store without robin Edit: glad you'll liked it

Phrase Jokes More Phrase Jokes

What phrase is a compliment in America, but an argument in the Middle East?

No, YOU the bomb.

What is the craziest/weirdest/most interesting/most unique/ uncommon phrase you've ever heard?

I am working on a project, and its going to revolve around a phrase. I need it to be really out there, yet could be used in everyday life. But honestly just give me anything you got.

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What did the redditor say when he opened his package from the UniBomber?

Wow, I did not expect this post to blow up

Why did the atom stick around?

Cuz if he split, the situation would have gotten blown out of proportion.

Lay Jokes More Lay Jokes

What is the difference between an egg and a redditor?

Eggs get laid at least once.

Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway?

What could go wrong " My son apparently

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What was James Bond after he slept through an earthquake?

Shaken, not stirred.

What's the best thing about sleeping with twenty two year old's?

There is twenty of them.

Box Jokes More Box Jokes

Why did they never make a pregnant Barbie?

Because Ken always came in another box.

Why is it best to ship boxes using a UPS truck?

The DOWNS truck is a little slow.

Shark Tooth Jokes More Shark Tooth Jokes

What do you call the mushy red stuff between shark teeth?

Slow swimmers

What's the gummy stuff between sharks teeth?

Slow swimmers.