Blow Jokes

In case you hadn't noticed, the color of the wind is 'blew.' Water always looks 'wet' to me. Dirt is oviously 'dirty.' Soup seems 'soupy.' If you can't find those Crayons in your box, contact CRAYOLA.

What does a blonde and a tornado have in common?

They both start blowing but in the end they take everything from you.

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?

Because the ref was blowing a foul.

Which joke has the maximum HOT Nuns in it?

You don't know none.. And here to learn one.. So when you are with your friends.. Or walking with your son.. Tell them reddit jokes.. thinking now they would listen... (to you) play it cool, play it slow.. No need to blow.. Take this further, take this far.. till sang by a star. (Improvise it as you like, don't care about the grammar. No rapper does.)

Why did the Hydroxyl molecule blow up the US Mint?

It was a Free Radical.

April Sale

Love Card

$5.99

Why are MMA fighters told not to blow their nose when in a fight?

Oops, this was supposed to be for. There's no punch line!

What do you get when you throw a grenade into a kitchen in France?

Linoleum blown apart

What has nine arms and blows?

Def Leppard

What sound will reddit make when it blows up?

Nothing, it's just a website.

What sound does Reddit make when it blows up?

Pao! Edit: Whoa, FP gold. Thank you!

How did Watson and crick blow their chance with a hot girl?

They said, "baby you'd look good if you got a pair of skinny genes"

Why did the terrorist blow up the playground?

He was a suislide bomber!

Why did Kanye blow up the bakery?

Because no one man should have all that flour.

Why did the angry skeptic keep ignoring official reports about the eventual release of Half-Life 3?

He was blowing off Steam

What do you call some soapy water on the floor?

Now you're just some bubbles that I used to blow.

April Sale

Love

$5.99

What happens when you combine TNT with a hard drive?

It gets blown to

Why did the blonde have lipstick all over her steering wheel?

She was trying to blow the horn

Why did the terrorist's post make it to the front page of reddit?

Because it blew up.

What is so brilliant with a Arabian blow-up doll?

They blow themselves up.

What's orange and sounds like a carrot!!!????

A snowman blowing his nose!!!!!!!!

How do you blow a movie quote?

You just put your lips together and whistle

What is the difference between a drunk driver and a high driver?

The drunk driver will blow through a stop sign without even knowing it was there.. The high driver will wait until it turns green

Why did the referee blow his whistle at the leper hockey game?

There was a face off at centre ice.

What did the redditor say when he opened his package from the UniBomber?

Wow, I did not expect this post to blow up

How do you keep your hair from blowing everywhere when you drive in a convertible?

Cross your legs

Why did the duck go to the basketball game?

He heard the ref was blowing fouls!

Why was the candle mad at his friend?

He blew him off.

What's the difference between CNN and Al-Jazeera?

CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al-Jazeera shows them landing. (Not mine, just heard it on the Jimmy Dore show) also "My favorite indie band is Palestinian. I think they're really going to blow up."

What did Optimus Prime say to Arcee?

Have you ever blown a Transformer?

Why did the H blow itself up?

Because the Jihad.

How does a mermaid give a man head?

She blows him out of the water

Why did Kanye West blow up the bakery?

Because no one man should have all that flour.

What did one deer say to the other after leaving the bar?

I can't believe you just blew 50 bucks in there

What's the difference between a paycheck and a D**k?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck.

Why did the duck cross the basketball court?

He heard the referees were blowing fouls... -Jim Norton

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?

He heard the ref was blowing fouls

Why Aren't Elephants Allowed On The Beach?

Because they always blow their trunks off!

What did the fuse say when it blew out?

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

What does a basketball player do before he blows out his candles?

He makes a swish!

What is the fastest speed a woman can go?

68, because when she turns 69 she blows a rod.

What's better than a rose on your piano?

Tulips on your organ EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)

Why did the fan blow itself?

Because it was turned on!

Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips?

From trying to blow out lightbulbs.

How do nursing babies blow their noses?

With breast tissue.

Why wasn't the chemist concerned when she blew up her experiment?

Oxidants happen,

What's so good about being a CPU?

Every time you are turned on, you're getting blown.

What does Marilyn Quayle have in common with Marion Barry?

They've both been known to blow a little dope.

How do you celebrate July 4th in Canada?

Not by getting drunk and blowing off your fingers, because it's just a regular day fir you.

What happened when the joke about terrorists got to the front page?

It blew up

How do you write an essay that blows people away?

With lots of drafts

What's roughly 6 inches long, has a head on it, and women love it so much that they often blow it?

A 20 dollar bill

What color is the wind?

Son: "What color is the wind " Mom: "The wind is the wind, it had no color. It's transparent" Dad: "The wind is blue" Mom: "Blue How so " Dad: "Because the wind blew"

Who thought blowing out candles on a cake was a good tradition?

Ah yes wax would go well with this cake and you know what else Child spit.

What is about 6 in long, has a head, girls love to blow it, and is in a guys pants?

A dollar bill you dirty minded people!! LMFAO

Who's there! Bronte! Bronte who?

Bronte of the blow!

What's a 68?

She blows me and I owe her one.

What is dry on the outside filled with water and blows up buildings?

A fish tank!

Why does Bernie Sanders support abortions?

Because even after he's blown his load he won't pull out.

What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

How do you make a candle really happy...?

Blow it out, it'll be delighted

Why is your blow up doll half deflated?

She was getting a little heavy..

What do women and saxophones have in common?

They both blow and make different noises when you finger them.

What's the difference between love, pure love and excessive love?

Blowing Swallowing Gargeling

Why did the Spanish train aficionado blow up his trains?

He had loco motives.

What is the real reason leaves fall to the ground?

They know people will blow them.

What do you hear when a sheep blows up?

Sis boom baa Carnac

What can you find in a man's pants that is about six inches long has a head on it and that women love so much that they often blow it?

A $20 bill

You might also enjoy:

Grenade Jokes More Grenade Jokes

Blow Jokes

What do "fake news" and isis have in common?

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What did the terrorist Redditor say on the plane?

What did Monica say to Hillary before Election Day?

What do Hillary and Monica have in common?

How are a grenade and a girlfriend similar?

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

Why can't a Samsung be disguised as an iPhone?

What do you call someone who blows himself up by accident?

What's a homotron?

What color eyes did Kurt Cobain have?

Why does it always seem like models' hair is blowing in the wind?

I Love Pizza & You

What begins with an "s", ends with a "x" and leaves a guy blown away?

How do you make a Kleenex dance?

Why did the train go to the brothel?

What's the difference between a terrorist training camp and an orphanage?

What did the pirate say when he walked into the brothel?

What Color Is It?

What does a blonde and a tornado have in common?

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?

Which joke has the maximum HOT Nuns in it?

Why did the Hydroxyl molecule blow up the US Mint?

Love Card

Why are MMA fighters told not to blow their nose when in a fight?

What do you get when you throw a grenade into a kitchen in France?

What has nine arms and blows?

What sound will reddit make when it blows up?

What sound does Reddit make when it blows up?

How did Watson and crick blow their chance with a hot girl?

Why did the terrorist blow up the playground?

Why did Kanye blow up the bakery?

Why did the angry skeptic keep ignoring official reports about the eventual release of Half-Life 3?

What do you call some soapy water on the floor?

Love

What happens when you combine TNT with a hard drive?

Why did the blonde have lipstick all over her steering wheel?

Why did the terrorist's post make it to the front page of reddit?

What is so brilliant with a Arabian blow-up doll?

What's orange and sounds like a carrot!!!????

How do you blow a movie quote?

What is the difference between a drunk driver and a high driver?

Why did the referee blow his whistle at the leper hockey game?

What did the redditor say when he opened his package from the UniBomber?

How do you keep your hair from blowing everywhere when you drive in a convertible?

Why did the duck go to the basketball game?

Why was the candle mad at his friend?

What's the difference between CNN and Al-Jazeera?

What did Optimus Prime say to Arcee?

Why did the H blow itself up?

How does a mermaid give a man head?

Why did Kanye West blow up the bakery?

What did one deer say to the other after leaving the bar?

What's the difference between a paycheck and a D**k?

Why did the duck cross the basketball court?

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?

Why Aren't Elephants Allowed On The Beach?

What did the fuse say when it blew out?

What does a basketball player do before he blows out his candles?

What is the fastest speed a woman can go?

What's better than a rose on your piano?

Why did the fan blow itself?

Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips?

How do nursing babies blow their noses?

Why wasn't the chemist concerned when she blew up her experiment?

What's so good about being a CPU?

What does Marilyn Quayle have in common with Marion Barry?

How do you celebrate July 4th in Canada?

What happened when the joke about terrorists got to the front page?

How do you write an essay that blows people away?

What's roughly 6 inches long, has a head on it, and women love it so much that they often blow it?

What color is the wind?

Who thought blowing out candles on a cake was a good tradition?

What is about 6 in long, has a head, girls love to blow it, and is in a guys pants?

Who's there! Bronte! Bronte who?

What's a 68?

What is dry on the outside filled with water and blows up buildings?

Why does Bernie Sanders support abortions?

What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?