I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it
They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)
He wanted to see stars during the day.
Who knows, they never get the house.
First they are all wild and wet, then they take your house.
Gordan Ramses
Because if we could I would edit a tweet with 2,000 retweets to say "RT if you hate puppies and babies."
The Tie of the Igor.
Because they're always dead tired. I stole this from plain and simple. Just straight up stole it. Why? Because it made me laugh and I didn't see it posted here before.
Orphan shaped ones.
Jalapeno business! ha ha.. haha.. ha love this joke (Usually accompanied with three snaps of the fingers in the shape of the letter Z and moving my head from side to side)
A person who stays up all night wondering whether or not there is a dog.
Someone who stays up all night, wondering if there is a dog.
To golf the golf ball size hail and catch the baseball size hail
10 after 1
RickRosstrich.
