How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting?

Talk in your sleep.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Whats the emergency?

My wife is suffocating me -Literally or figuratively sir Well thats a stupid question. How would I be talking

Why couldn't Muhammad pick his wife up from childcare?

Because Muslim girls can't go to school

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why can't you talk to spiders who get shut in pianos?

They'll B flat

Why didn't you talk to me about renting a bouncy house?

Me stops jumping: You would have said no

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What has a mouth but never speaks, Has a bed but never sleeps, And has legs but never walks?

Amp;nbsp; A mute, crippled insomniac

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

Interrupt Jokes More Interrupt Jokes

Why does the CPU never get any work done?

Because it gets interrupted constantly.

How do you interrupt a Redditor's winning streak?

The Game

Listen Jokes More Listen Jokes

How is that racist?

I said I wasn't racist. You never listen. Typical Mexican.

Why did Gandalf never listen to the song "Dream Police"?

Because he was no conjurer of Cheap Trick

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

What word starts with "n" and you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

What's another word for double-dating?

Consolidating